Thursday, January 10, 2013

Phobias, Sketchbooks and Resolutions



Lady in Purple
encasutic on birch 6x8

Ok, I admit it... I have a phobia. Its one that I've decided to tackle in the new year. Its not a huge thing like a phobia of spiders or heights. But it is one that is a bit concerning as an artist. I'm going to address the elephant in the room. "Uh hum - Elephant? You are really cute, honestly.. but you do take up a lot of space and its time for you to move - at least to another room."

My phobia? - It's sketchbook-a-phobia... I hang my head in shame. Honestly, compliling artwork in a sketchbook brings me great stress. I think its the anal perfectionist side of me that just has a real hard time handling the idea that there are bad drawings, paintings and sketches in the book as well as the good ones and many that fall somewhere in between. I buy them - sketchbooks, I have them and I've even started some. But, as soon as the less than perfect thing happens in the book - well, its tainted and that's the end of it for me. Or really, the mere thought of creating a less than perfect drawing in a book makes me run far and fast in the opposite direction. I even have one that I have about 5 or 6 pages of good drawings - but I can't bring myself to add another for fear the good luck has run out and a dud will appear. So it sits in the started but never completed pile of sketchbooks - kind of like the land of the misfit toys.


Face
Oil in Sketchbook :)
So.. in 2013 I'm going to suck it up and get over this thing. I spend every Friday visiting blogs where artists are creating art journal pages, sketches while in restaurants, travel sketches, backyard sketches, all kinds of beautiful paintings, drawings and sketches - AND... all these are in books mind you! Inspiring to say the least. I hold these people up as the amazing sketchbook idols that they are. So, here it is in big letters - red too just to really make the point:

In 2013, I'm going to finish a sketchbook, one that I started already and I will show it here when its complete - warts and all. I'm saying this out loud because I'm good to my word - and I've said it - so now I have to do it. I even bought one that does not have tear out pages!

Happy Friday everyone. Thank you to my fellow PPFr's for your weekly inspiration. Hit the button and visit some of my sketchbook idols as well as many other amazing artists.




37 comments:

  1. Oh I feel the same way! Plus I feel constricted by a page. It helps some people, and hurst other kinds of people... I started one book just to test myself and do it (plus I won in in a friend's giveaway lol) so I enjoyed that one, but I do not see myself doing more.
    And that's ok too :o)
    Beautiful portraits!

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  2. Good luck with your resolution....

    I sort of know how you feel but with journaling if you don't like a page you can just paint over it or collage over it - which is a good feeling.

    I do think (in theory!) there is no such thing as 'bad art'. Your bad art is good because it is helping you to know what you don't like.

    Your art that you have shared here is beautiful

    Karen x

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  3. Firstly... I love the artwork. You certainly have a way with portraits. Second sketch books... ugh!!! Yes they are good to focus us and I have had to train myself to use them. They free you up and are supposed to be a place where mistakes are made and ideas flourish. Like you I had to let go of the perfectionist side. Funny my next blog is about this very subject. I even make my own sketch pads now. Enjoy them... it is possible.

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  4. Dear Marji.
    I wish you to create a sketchbook which you are happy with. I know that feeling of making works which I am happy with and then to be scared of loosing that connection. but i am trying to work on it focus the most on the pleasure and joy of experience and creating process rather than final effect. I really recommend reading Julia Cameron 'The artist's way' she describes so well all those artistic worries in such a heartful way. I absolutely love your paintings as well, they are fantastic. Have a lovely PPF!!!

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  5. You are not alone in this! I am the same way and can totally relate. I have lots of wonderful sketchbooks I've bought, art journals too...but don't touch them. The way I got over this was to buy a watercolor Moleskine journal...LOVE it and it was just begging to be used, I just started yesterday and can't wait to work in it today. Find the right book and you'll be on your way! Happy PPF!

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  6. Loving your gorgeous lady spread. Oil in an art sketchbook how wonderful, it must take ages to dry. Happy PPF, Annette x

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  7. Am back again as realised I hadn't said how beautiful your encaustic painting is. Happy PPF, Annette x

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  8. I've never really thought about that before with sketchbooks it's a good point but I guess I got past mine with a little tool called a paper clip. I close the old pages so the book is reopened at a fresh page every time thus relieving the torture of the occasional crappy page.

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  9. Your faces have strength and personality. Saludos

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  10. Marji your art is so wonderful, how can you be afraid of messing up, and hey imperfections can be beautiful too! Honestly your pieces always have me in awe, so please enjoy your lovely art, imperfections and all!

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  11. If you can do these kind of faces you must certainly not be afraid. Doing mistakes and 'not so nice' drawings and paintings is part of the process of becoming an artist, I think.

    Happy PPF and good luck with your journey through your art-journal!

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  12. First, may I say that your paintings take my breath away! Wow!!! So beautiful and talented, why the anxiety over a less than perfect drawing? Just get a sketchbook that you can remove pages from if you aren't happy with the results. I hope that you will be able to get over this phobia and enjoy your creative talent. You are a fabulous artist. Happy PPF!

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  13. You are extraordinarily talented! I am not a portrait person, meaning I have always thought why would anyone want a portrait of a person they don't have an emotional connection with. But when I visit your pages on PPF, I am astounded at how beautiful they are. It feels like you caress each area of the faces, they are alive! Amazing!

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  14. Wonderful paintings, just incredibly stunning! HPPF! Good luck with the sketchbook! :)

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  15. Absolutely stunning and divine art work ~ such talent ~ Wow!

    A Creative Harbor) aka ArtMuseDog and Carol ^_^

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  16. I completely know what you mean! I have the same thoughts about sketchbooks sometimes.

    Beautiful work though - maybe you shouldn't worry so :)

    Sarah @ A Cat-Like Curiosity

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  17. You can do this Marji-I know you can!! And you know what? if you get REALLY discouraged by a page you want to rip away-DON'T. Just gesso over it and start again. You may even be happily surprised by the under layers :) Happy PPF!

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  18. Your goal of finishing a sketchbook for 2013 is wonderful!
    I loved participating in The Sketchbook Project where all the participants shared this goal, too!
    You can do it, Marji!!
    ♥♥♥
    Happy PPF!!
    Mary
    Mixed-Media Map Art

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  19. Your work is so wonderful and if you can do that without sketching kudos to you! I have a similar thing about sketchbooks. I can sketch happily on loose bits of paper, but a book, like you it gets abandoned after 10 pages or so. Thats why I have taken to journal pages, as they say above you can paint over it. Good luck.

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  20. Beautiful and striking portrtaits! Thanks for your honesty about your sketchbook struggles... looking at your caliber art, I would have never guessed that you ever van turn out anything less than amazing. So it helps those of us who look up to you to realize that excellent art comes through practice, practice, practice - some practices then become works of art and some just remain studies and learning experiences:-)

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  21. Wow..such incredibly stunning paintings! Beautiful! And Yay..shine on..wishing you creative joy on your new adventures!
    Victoria
    PS: sorry if two comments come through..i had some trouble commenting

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  22. Any sketch book would be proud to have your lovely work in it! Hugs, Valerie

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  23. The other day I wrote a long comment that disappeared!! You are not alone...I have the same phobia... I rip pages out, some I abandon, others have only a few good sketches much like yours...big time phobia....I thought I was alone!!

    Your artwork is sooo beautiful...hard to believe there's a bad piece in the lot!!
    These are gorgeous paintings!

    Hugs Giggles

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  24. Way to go..I did a full year of journaling.. not daily but month by month of what was going on in our yard and area and it was so much fun and thats the beauty part about journaling.. its not supposed to be fine art. its supposed to be fun and something to just keep you inspired to keep painting or what ever you do and you do yours so well. Just dive in and dont worry about quality it all comes as you progress in it. and kick that inner critic to the curb. I have my inner critic demons to kick too. Guess we can all work on something. :) HPPF

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  25. what a great post and i can totally relate to what you said! other than sketchbooks i used at art class in school many years ago, the only time i've finished a sketchbook was for the sketchbook project a couple of years ago and i did get really annoyed with myself when i created a less than perfect illustration as i had to send the whole book off to the project (i did rip a page out in fact!)
    anyway, a fellow blogger told me about the 75day sketch challenge and i've just ordered a sketch book on amazon especially-the idea is to use pen to remove the safety net of erasing pencil mistakes and it's to make you focus on your drawing skills which i totally don't. i'm looking forward to starting it.
    btw, if all your art is like the illustrations in your post then you have no worries about something imperfect spoiling your sketchbook-they're stunning!

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  26. Your work is amazing.... so full of depth and emotions. I can't wait to see how you fill you book :0) I love working in my art journal...it relaxes me because I dont' have to focus on perfection.

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  27. I have never managed to do encaustic art- I did try though. WOW. Happy PPF.

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  28. oh Marji! what an adventure!! wow, that's sort of sweet, being afraid of leaving ugly marks! I can totally feel how that could be the case... I have heard some say that through our imperfections our most creative solutions arise so maybe this could inspire you to continue? beautiful encaustic pieces! I adore the first one especially.

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  29. Welcome to sketch book/art journal world! I have a page now and then that wasn't great or good or I botched a part of it...I've even a few I've patched! So what? It's my book, my art, and it just shows that it's not always easyr I'm not perfect and I am real okay about that reality. In the end I usually like most of my pages. I like seeing my progress too.

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  30. I think I neglected to say how terrific these two paintings are! I hope you think so too!! ;-)

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  31. Wish you all the best with your new resolution...and I am absolutely sure your sketch book is going to be one of the most magical and finest treasure that you would cherish forever!!

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  32. Lady in purple is totally mesmerizing. Love her!

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  33. I'd like to have a sketchbook of just what you consider to be bad pages - I bet even they are great! But I totally get it. I have a really hard time committing to making pages in my "good art" journals, in case they don't end up as good art. I even have a couple of journals that are too nice and I can't get myself to mess them up by starting them. So I'm rooting for you!

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    Replies
    1. You are so right - I was thinking the same thing bout Marji's work! I get the idea of "good" books, though....the fear of messing up something after doing something good is one of mine as well! Here's to all of us being brave together!

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  34. Absolutely wonderful face painting. Blessings, Janet PPF

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  35. This is so funny - I"ve been thinking the same thing! I have books started, but not completed, and 2013 is THE year! thanks for your post - you have so MANY good sketches, though, I don't think you should worry!!!!

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  36. Your faces are amazing! I think it's a great idea to put it on your blog about finishing a sketchbook. It certainly will keep you accountable. I hated keeping sketchbooks and once I set my mind to it I began to love it. I started in a date planner and made tiny sketches in the boxes. Once I started I couldn't stop. Good luck I know it will look fantastic when finished.

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