Coming Together, Finishing Up and the Encaustic Rhino

Rhino
encaustic 30 x 30
 



 Its an exciting day when things come together.  I've been really perplexed on a couple of paintings and how to finish them - to bring them to completion.  My Rhino friend here has been one of them.  She has been hanging around the studio for months - shifting from one place to another... waiting.  I really love her - and I wanted to finish her, but the background was really not working.  She is one of the paintings that came from Flora Bowley's class back in the fall.  Her texture and colors are really perfect for a Rhino and I just couldn't get myself to paint over her and have her become just another layer for something new.  There were some close calls - when I felt that maybe those two peaks on her back would make a good start to a landscape - like some sort of mountains in the background.  Yet, I couldn't do it - I couldn't paint over her.  So she sat... and sat.
Until Friday last week... finally, the background came together after a few tries.  I guess it goes to show that the paintings sometimes need to come together on their own.. at their own pace - when they are ready. 

Also, I couldn't resist sharing some photos from my show - I was so worried about having enough work and really... there is plenty.   I've already sold two - YAY!  

 

Show at Coldwell Banker Bain
Edmonds, WA
April 1-30, 2013

Show at Coldwell Banker Bain
Edmonds, WA
April 1-30, 2013

Wrapping up with Flora Bowley, Hare Brained and Ira Glass

 

Vegetable Dreams
encaustic 20x30
 

Before
And.. actually before this - it was a portrait.  It was a face with long flowing hair that was to be a mermaid with a underwater background.  It was one of those panels in my studio that lost its way.  It has become one more layer and makes a richer deeper painting to think that a mermaid lives under Vegetable Dreams :)

I seem to be hare brained at the moment - in a good way. 

I've spent the past 5 weeks Blooming True with Flora Bowley.  Its been an amazing journey for me and I have shared some thoughts and some of my intuitive paintings over this time.  After this process, I am not sure if I can go back to the way I was painting - at least not for a while.   For me, the journey has been fun and full of unexpected twists and turns that have helped me discover or uncover new desires in my artwork.  I'm finding color - real awesome color.  I'm finding BIG - painting BIG is fun.  I'm finding a joy in painting animals.

 

I do have to say that it saddens me a little to understand that some of my classmates are not experiencing the joy that I am finding in this process.  There is frustration and disappointment with results.  Art is so very personal and so very easy to self critique and compare - especially in classroom situations.  The intuitive painting process is not easy.  Its not.  It requires an open mind, open heart, the ability to really let go of everything you've been taught about structure, planning, and rules.  It is much harder than it sounds because our inner critic makes it so.  Its a little easier for me because I have had no formal training to undo.

I feel they are a little too hard on themselves, especially at this point in the game.  We are all learning and in the early stages of getting this process which is so very different than I know I have ever tried.  It takes time, patience, practice and kindness.  This prompted me to pull out one of my favorite quotes that I felt was a fitting reminder to all of us who do creative work.

 

“Nobody tells this to people who are beginners, I wish someone told me. All of us who do creative work, we get into it because we have good taste. But there is this gap. For the first couple years you make stuff, it’s just not that good. It’s trying to be good, it has potential, but it’s not. But your taste, the thing that got you into the game, is still killer. And your taste is why your work disappoints you. A lot of people never get past this phase, they quit. Most people I know who do interesting, creative work went through years of this. We know our work doesn’t have this special thing that we want it to have. We all go through this. And if you are just starting out or you are still in this phase, you gotta know its normal and the most important thing you can do is do a lot of work. Put yourself on a deadline so that every week you will finish one story. It is only by going through a volume of work that you will close that gap, and your work will be as good as your ambitions. And I took longer to figure out how to do this than anyone I’ve ever met. It’s gonna take awhile. It’s normal to take awhile. You’ve just gotta fight your way through.”  Ira Glass



Fight On! - and remember to be kind to yourself.  Use kind words when thinking about and making your creative work.  Thoughts become things - really.  Realize that not every single thing you make is gallery quality.   But that's OK - because we make art for ourselves.  I have 6 other panels that are in various stages in my studio right now.  Some of them are the ugliest ducklings ever  - but I have faith they will grow into beautiful swans.

U2, Bravery, and Hares

Trixster
encaustic 30x30

I'm ready for shuffle
I'm ready for the deal
I'm ready to let go of the steering wheel.
I'm ready
 - Bono (U2-Zoo Station) - you can listen here

We're talking about Bravery in week 4 of my painting class.  This is a favorite song of mine from the Achtung Baby album.  It seemed to work here.  When you are brave, its OK to let go of the steering wheel and face the unknown.  I'm ready, ready for what's next.

I have written about bravery in the past.  Yet, I think being brave is one of those topics that can be revisited often.  Its one that if we allow ourselves to be comfortable in how things are going, it gets harder and harder to be brave.  The farther we get away from the edge where it takes a brave act to cross over, the farther we get from our authentic selves.  Being brave is not backing away from fears, but moving into them and beyond.  When you actually do move through the fear and break out the other side, the opportunity comes for your authentic self to shine.  Being brave opens the door to an aliveness inside.  It stirs things up, gets the juices flowing, ignites a fire.  Being brave is about moving outside of the comfort zone.  It means, trying something new, doing that thing that I don't really want to do or I'm afraid to do, or facing conflict or going into the studio without a plan.  I believe being brave puts you in a position to find how far you can push yourself and then reveals how strong you really are. Its surprising and uplifting to realize the power that we hold inside.  

Its a brave act to paint intuitively.  It is starting with nothing and embracing mystery.  Its trusting the process and just knowing that in the end, a painting will emerge out of the layers.  Its a brave act to keep going, keep layering even if the painting isn't cooperating at all.  Its brave to "just know" and believe.  Its a brave act to paint BIG, especially from where I started.

This hare painting is a brave act for me.  Its not like any other painting I have done.  Yet, it is so much me.   Where do the ideas come from?  When does it seem right to paint a hare and an upside down hare?  I can't explain it.  Did I see the hare within the layers and build from there?  No, not from an image within the painting, but in my mind's eye, yes.  I just knew I wanted to paint a hare in the lower left of the painting in just this way.  I followed the thread and this is where this painting wanted to go.  So, I'm not necessarily looking for an image to emerge from the layers of the painting, rather it is just a feeling as to which direction to go.  As I do the layers, and let go of the steering wheel, its allowing the door to open to something I would never have considered before.  Its then taking that something and running with it and following its lead.

I'm actually looking forward to seeing what the next painting brings.  It is a beautiful way to paint by just playing and letting things go without thinking.  Its a way to let myself just dream up something without worrying about it.  If it doesn't work out, its just one more layer.   I can say, that I was not expecting the deer or the hares to show up, I wasn't expecting to paint animals, I wasn't expecting how joyful bright colors are to paint with or how wonderful it is to paint BIG... so mystery is kinda fun.  And... painting animals goes all the way back to my roots as a kid.  Its where I started and now I'm returning home.  At least for now.

Friday.. you know what that means - Party Time!!

PS - If you are interested... This is what the Hare Totem means:

Hares are connected to both the earth element and to the lunar energies of the moon. The gestation period of a hare is 28 days, the same time as the moon. Hares are quick with the ability to twist and turn. As a totem or power animal the hare teaches us to aim for our dreams and not let anything get in our path.  The hare is an independent, solitary animal that often lives alone. In modern society the loners of the world are often frowned upon, but history has proved these types of people to be invaluable and they should feel a sense of pride within themselves.

Unlike rabbits, hares cannot be tamed (although there is a domesticated rabbit which has the name hare, but is in fact a rabbit). They have a wild nature to them. They are the totem of people who like to run free.

Hares have been associated with magic and the ability to walk between worlds and connect to the other world. The hare is a totem of mystery and misunderstanding.

The hare is often seen as a trickster and to many people the trickster is seen as a negative trait. The trickster though may simply do things different to the norm. They may be the individual who stands out from the crowd and does things their way. The trickster is the one who will break rules and rebel; they are the sort of people that can create great changes within society. As with all attitude, the clue is how you use your power – the trickster archetypal can be cunning or foolish. They can be a power for good or a symbol of disruption. Tricksters often have two spirits that they present to the world. [They] can also be the hero. . . .

- Samantha Grayson

Thinking BIG and being BRAVE, thanks to Flora Bowley

WIP
love in the layers

Notes on thinking BIG and being BRAVE.

Since I've been taking Flora Bowley's intuitive painting course, I've started to think BIG.  In the beginning of my encaustic career, I painted 3x3 paintings.  I was terrified of thinking about anything bigger than that.  It was overwhelming to imagine painting big.  Over time, I grew to like 5x5, then 8x8 and graduated to10x10.  I settled in on the latter two and have painted in that size for a while.  The biggest I had ever painted was 24x30.  Now that was big... and terrifying.. and there is only one.  I easily slid back into the smaller realm, the comfort zone. 
During the spring, Dick Blick had a sale on Ampersand Encaustic panels.  I bought 4 large 30x30 squares, 4 24x24 squares and 4 18x24.  Why?  No clue.  The prices were great and I guess I was dreaming that someday I would overcome small.  They sat in the garage in boxes - It was too much for me to think about what and how I would go about using such large white panels.  I knew there were there, ready for someday.  It was a small victory in and of itself that they were even in my possession. 
Flora wants her students to paint BIG - like 40x60 or 48 square.  The thought is to give lots of space to create, play and just explore.  I prepped a 24x24 panel with the initial layers of clear wax to start.  Definitely outside of the comfortable 10x10 size.  I did decide to pull out a 30x30, and I prepped that one too.  As of today, I have completed two 30x30 panels with paintings that make me smile.  The 24x24 panel is ready to go, but unused.. why?  It's too small.  At this point, I can't think about small, I want BIG, BIGGER.  Its so much easier to get some detail, add lots of color and interest.  I used to want smooth paintings... now I want ones with all the crags and crevices, pits and holes that make wax painting so luscious.  Starting with a large white blank panel - bring it!  The process of layering in color and marks to cover all that white is so fun.  I'm ready to get started on the next one.  No plan, no problem.  The painting is not going in a direction I like - no worry, it becomes another layer.  Its a way different way of thinking for me.  I like it.
We're visiting BRAVERY this week in class.  Yep, BIG is BRAVE.

Inspiration, Vade Mecum and Intuitive Art

Vade Mecum
encaustic 30x30

Inspiration in our lives.  This is what we are visiting this week in my intuitive painting class.  So what inspires me? 

1. laughter
2. sunrise
3. nature
4. the color orange
5. my Mom
6. older people out enjoying life
7. beauty in words
8. creating something from the heart
9. magic moments
10. so many more...

Number 8 and number 9 need a little more explination.

#8
For me, number 8 is not necessarily creating art.  There is so much more to creating from the heart, at least I believe so.  For me, its things like:
Making my husband's lunch in the morning.  Sending a "thinking of you " text to a friend.  Writing thoughtful words.  Sharing a smile.
 
#9
You've seen it - the way the light shines in just the right way, there is a certain radience to it that lights up an object in a delightful way.  My Dad called these magic moments. He had honed his senses to see these things in life - the magic moments.  He would stop and pause, and watch that split second when the light on an object was perfection.  He would stand and stare, taking it in and remembering the detail of it.  He logged hunderds of magic moments into his mind where they would stay until needed for inspiration.

I also find inspiration in collecting things that catch my eye.  I have little piles that have come from pockets, stashes of colorful things, cards. pages torn from magazines, 1000s of photos in Picasa.  I have the need to touch fabrics and objects.  I take artist dates to Anthropolgie and I think I touch just about everything in that store.  I have to.. its in my wiring, the curiosity and the need to connect with things that inspire me.  I often pick up things, touch things, thumb through books and pause to look at something without thinking - it just happens. When we draw inspiration from our lives.. its not just the tangible things that we can lay hand to. Sometimes its the words of friends, its the steam curling from a bowl of hot soup, a smile, the way the flavor of dark chocolate dances on your tounge. The thing about finding inspriation in our everyday life is to notice it.   It's the ability to feel that little flutter of the heart when something inspiring lights up the moment and we learn to recognize it and take a mental or physical note of it. There is no telling when that glimmer of inspiration might circle back and be the thread that leads to something new. 

The deer painting above is my first intuitive piece.  He just showed up during my last painting session.  I had kept a photo of a deer - one of my things I collected somewhere along the way.  His image kept dancing across my mind.  So, here he is.  Several layers of playful color introduced over the past couple of weeks in Flora Bowley's class resulted in this painting.  He was painted with no thought, no sketch.. freehand with only a notion that he was what needed to be on this panel.  When I started to paint him, I kept telling myself - don't think, just paint.   I did spiral out to clean up a few mistakes - like an oversized ear, but really, he is pretty much how he came to be.  There was a point that I just knew, I was finished - no more.   I have a feeling he is here to guide me on my way to new destinations of colorful art - thus his name Vade Mecum.
It's Party Time - YAY!

Layers, Tapestries and Shine

J
detail of a larger piece
encaustic

In my intuitive art class that I am taking, one of the big lessons I am learning is the beauty of the underpainting.  The layers beneath the surface are deep and broad.   In our class we are learning to let the underlayers build and weave a beautiful fabric of color, happiness and play.  There is no thinking in the early stages, only painting, layering and mark making.  No critiques, no analysis, no standing back - just paint.  When I find myself standing back to analyze.. I quit, stop.. and wrap up.  The layering process is a warm palette followed by cool and so on.. with bold strokes and freedom... put on the panel using the beat of music and different tools.  The colors intertwine and intermingle to create an amazing story behind the final work.  As the painting progresses it is up to me to bring to the surface, the story of what lies beneath.  I'm looking forward to this final step.
It really makes me pause when I think of a painting in this way.  I'm usually, so focused on the surface and how it looks that it didn't occur to me about this underlying tapestry of layers.   As the artist of a multilayered piece, I am the only one who really knows the mystery of what lies under the surface of my artwork.  In the end, its my job to bring all that to surface and let it shine and tell its story.   
I've been reusing old panels. the paintings that I made in the beginning of my encaustic learning.  I'm finding, because they hold the story of the beginnings they make the paintings so much deeper and richer.  Its not about starting over with these, its about building on the roots that are already there.  I didn't white them out or scrape them back.. I just built upon them.
 
All of this is making me think of how it relates to us as individuals.  We all hold an amazing tapestry that we have created through our lifetime.  How do we bring to life and let shine the beautiful multicolored layering that lies under the surface of each of us?  We, as the artists of our lives, need to think about how bring all this beauty within, tell its multifaceted story and let it shine, baby... Let it shine!
Happy Friday everyone...  hit the button and see some amazing artwork.

PS.. we're still working on layers in class.  I really don't have anything to show yet.  Stay tuned... I'm getting closer. 

Intuition, Listening and Practice

Sentinel
encaustic on birch 16x16

INTUITION

I - Internal
N - Natural
T - True
U - Unmistakable
I - Instinctive
T - Tuned In
I - Insightful
O - On the Mark
N - Never Fails

I don't remember where I found these words actually.  But, I wrote it down thinking that I would put it in an art journal or at least do something with it.  So, here it is today - fitting actually, as I am working on painting more intuitively by taking Flora Bowley's Bloom True e-course.
The thing about intuition is that you first have to hear it.  For many, that is not so easy.  Our lives have geared us to hear only the chatter of everyday and all that chatter can drown out our internal voice. Our minds are a little over run by the ego, so to listen to the heart or the gut is a bit tough. Then, to actually trust it and act upon it takes even more mojo. Its a mutual trust thing - this acting on a gut feeling or listening to the heart. It doesn't really matter from where it originates in you, its just there, waiting to be heard.  Intuition is there to guide us and provide us with wisdom.

So, how do we hear it - this wisdom within?  Well, I think it is something we must work on every day.  Its not just a matter of listening today and it works.  Sometimes that works, but other times we are met with silence just when we feel we need a little help.  I believe that the ability to tune in is like any other skill in our lives - practice makes perfect.   So starting today, lets each carve a little time out to tune in.  I think we will all be pleasantly surprised at the amazing things which will result from a little listening time.

We are still in the early layering stages for the intuitive painting class, so I don't have much to show at this point.  I should have something to show you all by next week.  I worked up Sentinel in between making panels for class.  So, I guess there is a little intuitive carry over in this painting. I'm very happy with how she turned out.